Smiling

I like to smile. It's part of who I am. Not everyone enjoys smiling, I realize. Maybe that makes me weird? Or maybe it just makes me Southern? My face enjoys a good smile and sometimes my teeth just need to be flashed. I'm a smiler, ok?

Brits don't smile, at least not at strangers. I both talk to and smile at strangers. By the transitive property, I must not be a Brit. Last week I decided that I was going to conduct a little experiment and boldly smile like I haven't smiled since Austin (DC was a scary place to smile at strangers what with all the crack heads and teenage flashers in my neighborhood). Our neighborhood in London is not only safe, it's downright charming so I should survive this trial.

Here's how it will work: On my walk to and from the tube in Chiswick, I will make eye contact with as many people as I can (not an easy feat in and of itself in London!) and then give them a great big smile (with feeling). Afterwards, I will note whether they a) smiled back innocently b) smiled back with a glint in their eye saying 'what do you want?' c) smiled back with a 'how you doin'?' look in the eye d) glare angrily e) offer a confused look or f) look away quickly.

My money is most people will fall into the f category, assuming I can even make the initial eye contact. I'll let you know.

How I decided to get a cat

I am a dog person. I see a dog walking by and I greet him or her. I encourage them to come to me for a pet. I remark at how cute or pretty they are. I'm not sure what to do with a cat except leave it alone and admire it from a distance or allow it to brush against my leg (on its terms!) So imagine my surprise (and Andy's) when I said that I wanted to get a cat last week. I even went so far as to look up shelter where we could adopt one.

So why the heck would I say 'let's get a cat'? Well, it's very simple. Last week, Andy and I stumbled out of bed to find a tiny little mouse dying in our hallway. Egads! I have never seen a mouse in my house! Andy scooped up the little guy and took him to the trash outside. Gnarly. Yuck, yuck, yuck. When we got home from work we took the little mouse out of the trash can and walked it to down the street to a park just in case it woke up and wanted to have a run (or to release its spirit?) It just felt more compassionate.

When we moved here we heard that there were mice everywhere and with an old (even refurbished) home there will be cracks and holes and ways for little dying mice to get inside on a cold night. Regardless of how commonplace it may be to see mice, I am not cool with it... so our landlord called the council to come by and take care of it. Unfortunately, they told her there London was experiencing a mouse and rat infestation (words I never want to hear again!) and that it would be a week or so before they could come by. The British local government system is interesting. Everyone has a council. The taxes you pay to the council (and yes, we pay the taxes, not our landlord!) take care of things like trash, recycling, street lights maintenance and cleaning, maybe a few other things. They also entitle you to a discounted pest control service. Luckily our landlord offered to pay the few for the council to come out and take care of it. They come tomorrow and hopefully they find that it was a fluke the little mouse got in the house and they seal the hole where he made his entrance. If not, and they find out that we 'have mice' I am going to become a cat person immediately and try to adopt the most dog-like cat (ie something I can cuddle) I can find.

Learning to speak the language

For the last 8 weeks, I have been mentally compiling a British to American dictionary. When we moved here I was under the impression that England was, well, an English speaking country... and I was right, but I forgot I don't really speak it. Apparently, I speak American. Well that's ok, it's who I am, but I am starting to pick up the local language and assimilate.

For example, I went to the grocery store weeks ago and asked an employee where the zucchini was in the produce section. The what? He had no idea what I was talking about. 'Zucchini it's a vegetable,' I said. 'It's green and should be near the squash.' He gave me a very confused look and then went to consult a coworker. They both scratched their heads. When he came back over to me he asked what language zucchini was and a kind passerby told me that 'we call it courgette here.' That was my first British lesson. Many others would follow including a mad search for cilantro only to be told (after 5 stores) at a fruit and veg stand that 'we call it coriander leaf here.'

I have also learned a new sentence structure, I have, as well as how to respond to common greetings like 'you okay?' When I was first asked this, I thought, 'yes, I'm fine, wait, don't I look like I am fine?' but what I said was, 'I'm ok' or something like that. What I was supposed to say (and have since responded with) was 'Yea, I'm good' because really they are asking 'How are you?' There is a variation of this greeting in Australia which confused me years ago (they say "how are you going' to which I always wanted to say back 'by foot' or 'by bus') so I have adjusted to the British greeting quickly.

Before moving here I knew that there were a few new terms I would have to get used to-- rubbish bin (trash can), post box (mailbox), boot (trunk of the car), bonnet (hood of the car), and a few others like pub, cheers, ta, loo, and flat-- but I kind of thought I knew them all. Most of the new words I have had to add to my lexicon are things I just would not have thought of and would never had known if we didn't live here (they never used these words on Coupling). As a tourist you wouldn't go to the grocery store and buy a bunch of ingredients for a recipe that you always cook in the US and expect to be able to by here. For those of you that were contemplating a move across the pond, here is an abbreviated dictionary for any number of random situations:

the grocery store:
chopped tomatoes-- diced tomatoes
creamed tomatoes--crushed tomatoes
bap-- hamburger bun
lindseed-- flaxseed
golden syrup-- kind of like molasses but not exactly
semi-skimmed milk-- 2% milk
cling film-- saran wrap
baking paper-- wax paper
bin liner-- trash bag
loo roll-- toilet paper

also, you will find it odd that eggs are stored on the shelf, not in the cold section

around town:
alight-- get off the train
humps-- speed bumps
high street-- main street of a neighborhood
hole in the wall-- ATM

at the gym:
press up-- push up
box-- step

getting dressed:
pants-- underwear
trousers-- pants
jumper-- sweater
smart-- well dressed
jersey-- shirt
cardy-- cardigan
morning suit-- gray pinstriped suit with tails worn at English weddings
lounge suit-- more casual man's suit

sports related knowledge:
We have also learned that you "support a team" you don't cheer for one. While playing a softball/baseball, if the ball pops up and you are going to catch it you would not say 'I got it, I got it' you would say your own name (!) so, "Andy, Andy, Andy!"

So, in short, I am learning a lot. This is just a partial list, of course. We recently went to our first English wedding which was really fun and very nice. More on that in another post but I will say that as two random Americans at a very British wedding, we were, dare I say, quite a hit! I think the Brits are learning a little bit from us too.